Destiny and Fate

[Aisin]

Are you familiar with the 'Final Destination' trilogy and the deaths that are featured in the films? I guess it's natural for us to NOT WANT to have such a terrible way to end our time here.

I didn't watch them, but I've read & heard the synopsis. I can't bring myself to watch any horror films ever since having a nightmare after watching the 'Resident Evil' movie. I know, it wasn't even scary. (How embarassing, now I'd appreciate you keep this revelation to yourself.) I didn't expect the nightmare actually. But somehow, I've decided to say goodbye to such visual & audio suggestions to the mind.

On the other hand, instead of 'not wanting' to die a certain way, or 'not wanting' to experience a certain thing, I prefer to 'want' some positive outcome. The reason being, it's more important what you picture in your mind, less important whether you want it or not.

As for the other issues, I'm sure you've tried many ways, and I'm sure many others here might have ideas and suggestions. I'll hold mine first. I applaud your effort and your awareness of the situation, that's quite an achievement in itself. One step at a time, and I'm sure you'll eventually find a way.

And Shezmear, I'm very glad and relieved to hear that the dream helped, and that everyone is fine.

[Robanan]

How much are you afraid of experiencing death or of experiencing physical damage?

There's no need to apologise for such a question. I don't mind sharing my thoughts/opinions in a forum.

Honestly speaking,for a couple of years, 'Death' has been in my thoughts a lot.
I think quite a lot on that. I'm not that afraid of death but always...always wonder about what will actually happen when it occurs...even after all that I've seeked / read that has touched me deeply. I believe that the body is a shell and my 'consciousness' will survive.
As for 'experiencing physical damage' - yes,that too has been in my thoughts from time to time. Are you familiar with the 'Final Destination' trilogy and the deaths that are featured in the films? I guess it's natural for us to NOT WANT to have such a terrible way to end our time here.

and also...it has been some time that I've got a feeling that my time on Earth will be over soon. That's a whole other story.

Thank you lomovsky for your exhaustive answer, my point is (without making any conclusions) that maybe, just maybe the unpleasent dreams that you experience are induced due to your inner fears of dying and/or getting hurt. No one can say that I am right for sure, except you yourself and that may happen only if you experience betterment of your dreaming experiences through letting go of fear. Indeed, others may still have even more, good advices for you as you may decide to give it a try.

I've seen those movies and I must admit they are, of the most disappointing movies I've ever seen in my life. In the sense that they show natural things happenning in unnatural ways just to justify all the ugly things that they show by the end of each movie. Life has a purpose and death happens naturally (without all those spooky death scenes where death comes to catch, trap, and kill you). Just notice how many people are being saved around the globe everyday from accidental/unnatural deaths (final destination scenarios) to see what I mean. Aren't we killing ourselves with our own technology?

[lomovsky]

wow,I've revealed quite a lot of myself..

Partly it is right, for how can you pursue your talents if you are buried under anxiety??But I don't think your higher self 'gave' you this anxiety to stop you from pursueing your talents. In fact, quite the opposite, perhapse your higher self gave you these talents to overcome your anxiety??

Thanks for your response
Yes,in fact,I've thought about that as well. Sometimes I'm also confused as to what is going on...because when I thought I hv done all the right things to overcome my anxiety,i realised that it's still there. Hardly ingrained. I've considered seeing a doc and take pills but I don't like its side effects. Chemical inbalance in my head?

May I ask, what is it in other people that causes your anxiety? Do you just worry about their perception of you, or is it you not liking something in them? And what made you realise that this is not the period for your talent to be pursued?

Hi Vesko. Thanks for these questions. It has made me think deeply.
Whenever I'm with people,even with people I know for quite a while, sometimes I'd feel it's just SO HARD to speak whatever I want. Then I lose some control of my whole body and I feel so imbalanced. I have done stuff to improve myself...like going out taking part in activities but soon I began to dislike doing it altogether. I used to be active in them but slowly my interest in them dwindled. I like being alone and sometimes I wonder if i'm an undiagnosed 'partly autistic' person.

Yes,I worry about their perception of me WHEN I'm anxious and NOT ABLE to be myself. It's also tough when they give me the 'evil eye'...or give me any kinds of stares.
It just doesn't feel right because they are so heavily LIVING their active lives,having a job and all that,while me,myself...I'm kinda disconnected from 'life as they know it'...and our vibes just don't merge.

and also...why would I want be the center of attention in pursuing my interests,when being 'center of attention' is something I can't stand? haha.

see? am I just a complete mess or am I living it according to plan?
I'm confused.
It's been a long time now...I just live day to day...having irregular sleeping times..and at times find myself looking out the window,staring at the tree.

All I'm doing now is to wait for a certain period. The '3rd event' I call it. The first was the '911 tragedy',the '2nd' - Tsunami. For the third,I've no idea what its actually going to be...but I could guess its nature. All this from a 'pattern' which I've found in my observations. I know this sounds freakish but I find it surprising when I discovered it. The first 2 events has actually followed this pattern. I don't know what got into me to 'put things together' and come up with that.

Any of you familiar with this site - http://www.xeeatwelve.com
The articles there interest me a lot.

[survivor]

Any of you familiar with this site - http://www.xeeatwelve.com
The articles there interest me a lot.

Hmmm.. Conspiracy site? The "Port Arthur" story (Australian massacre) makes for a great read. Be it true, or not, conspiracy sites are simply clutter for the mind,yep, your HS will be working overtime, to filter garbage. Sooner or later you will probably show little interest in these sites.

Anxiety!

Well, in the past I have suffered severe social phobia = (fear of crowds).

-treatment: I have taken anti-depressants, helped for a short time (temporary treatment, not a cure). I too, do not like prescribed medication.

-treatment: alcohol, (temporary treatment and not a healthy one at that, also not a cure).

-What would set me off! Busy shopping malls / packed sports arena's / out of my comfort zone / night clubs / socializing.

These days I rarely feel any symptoms of social phobia. When I go to shopping malls I simply tune out, (who wants to feel empathy of 1000 shoppers) @ times I may open myself up and observe shopper's, it makes you laugh on the inside.

Fear is a Factor! Enjoy life in short burst, with 1 or 2 friends or a very small group, gradually work your way up. If you're not comfortable going somewhere, then don't!

(For mine), when you release fear and love yourself a little more, anxiety will pass.

#Also, I'm familiar with the feeling of people staring at you, (paranoid?) well, spiritual people do attract attention.

[Vesko]

Lomovsky, if I can give you one solid piece of advice, I think you need to fully realise that if you don't follow your dreams, you would never ever be able to get rid of most of the crushing anxiety. Your dreams of becoming what you mentioned are obviously natural for you to pursue and are also very close to your heart. Something that is natural for you and very close to your heart, if you don't do it, you gradually or suddenly wreck your life. When you are aware of a great way to express yourself and develop your potential, and you don't try to realise it with all your mental and physical abilities (within reasonable limits, but in such cases one often discovers one's much less limited than one thinks) you will always feel anxiety and suffer badly, up to absolutely tragic consequences in life. Nothing else will help you to get rid of most of that anxiety, you can have only momentary relief, but the anxiety and associated problems will grow worse and worse. You need to act in the right direction as soon as possible, do not delay.

I will think and add more after you respond.

[lomovsky]

Lomovsky, if I can give you one solid piece of advice, I think you need to fully realise that if you don't follow your dreams, you would never ever be able to get rid of most of the crushing anxiety. Your dreams of becoming what you mentioned are obviously natural for you to pursue and are also very close to your heart. Something that is natural for you and very close to your heart, if you don't do it, you gradually or suddenly wreck your life. When you are aware of a great way to express yourself and develop your potential, and you don't try to realise it with all your mental and physical abilities (within reasonable limits, but in such cases one often discovers one's much less limited than one thinks) you will always feel anxiety and suffer badly, up to absolutely tragic consequences in life. Nothing else will help you to get rid of most of that anxiety, you can have only momentary relief, but the anxiety and associated problems will grow worse and worse. You need to act in the right direction as soon as possible, do not delay.

Hi Vesko,thanks for you response.
I do have moments of great inspiration to start a change in my life. Moments where I go - "yeah! I can do this!". It comes up now & then. I believe and sense that I do have the energy and strength from within to go for it...shooting through all the bad noise.

However I cannot ignore this other feeling which has intensified that concerns where the world is going. I hv seen signs which has surprised me. I'm not quite sure if I make myself see what I want to see or that..it is real. But I know that I hv the intelligence to judge if something is utter nonsense or not. it's still a feeling which I can't ignore just like that.

I hv to wait for a period which is coming up soon. I will act accordingly after this has passed.

[ptex]

Hi Lomovsky,
Please notice that everything you see (in movies, theaters, etc.), hear, read, believe, think about have a definite direct influence in your imagination (partially related with dreams), well being and perception of life.
As one moves towards a more balanced and natural way of living, one starts to pay close attention individually to each and every of these factors and clearly notices that some of them need changing.

Many years ago I used to watch horror movies, listen to heavy metal, read occasional doubtful material, go to discos and concerts, etc. As my conscience about myself and my role in this life changed I spotted each habit that was being harmful and simply "recycled" it. Progressively and without noticing it I just changed focus.

What I'm going to mention next is not new but I think it's never too much remembering that only what we experience in life is what we can call knowledge and everything else is just plain belief!!

When we analyse how much in our lives is composed of factual experience we come to the staggering and humiliating conclusion that it's not much, actually not much at all. This is one of the most difficult things to do (when done honestly) and when we realize this on our own this indicates that we're already thinking on our own and we're ready to start changing our world and challenging everything and everyone around us.

I hv to wait for a period which is coming up soon. I will act accordingly after this has passed.

I would advise (like Vesko is actually saying) not to wait anymore. This could be already a part of a new constructive attitude. In your everyday and at every moment you already have all the signs and answers you need, you just need to look and pay attention. What makes you think you need a special event to decide what to do? What will you do meanwhile? Think, feel and act accordingly that's all it takes.

[dloheb]