It is not a sentense where you can mentally repeat and say it. From my recent discovery, the love is more powerful and more blissful if you can love the person within from yours within. Asking yourself whether you still love someone even a few reincarnations later is a good question to find out. Removing all the physical appearance and imagining them as featureless virtually is a good example.
The most diificult is still to love the 'unlovable'.
A very interesting paragrahs from "The teachings of LOVE" by Thich Nhat Hanh
A number of Plum Village residents of Vietnamese origin want to go back to Vienam to help the children and the adults there. The war has created much divison, hatred and suspicion in the hearts of the people. These monks, nuns and lay people want to walk on their naive land, embrace the people and help them of their suffering. But before they can go back, they must prepare fro themselves. The people they want to help may not easy to love. Real love must include those who are difficult, those have been unkind. If they go back to Vietnam without first learning to love and understand deeply, when they find the people there being unpleasant, they will suffer and may even come to hate them.
A very good quote. You mentioned something very important to me bomo. Some time ago I asked Dr. TJ in his forum about this subject:
The greatest challenge for our feelings always comes from the interaction with people to whom we are emotionally attached. It is not a coincidence. Let me explain.
When you examine yourSelf, you will find that you have a fundamental conscious need to be ACCEPTED and UNDERSTOOD. Everyone conscious, from plants and bacteria to human beings have this need. It is the essence of Conscious Existence.
Note, that when this basic need is NOT satisfied - it is almost impossible to experience Higher feelings such as Love. We may even say that acceptance and some degree of understanding are actually the NECESSARY CONDITIONS not only for Love to exist, but even to "feel good".
When we are alone, we CAN accept and understand ourSelves. We CAN accept and understand others. We also feel accepted and understood by Nature and the Universe. Therefore we CAN attain sincere feelings of Love in the absence of the feedback from others.
Now imagine that the "foundation" of acceptance and understanding is completely missing. Imagine that other people demonstrate that they NOT accept you, your thoughts and your ideas - they are not even interested. They "have eyes" but they DO NOT even WANT to SEE who you really are. All they are concerned with is "appearances". They want to SEE you smile, but they are not interested to become aware of what THOUGHTS make you happy.
It is difficult to "feel good" isn't it?
Of course, we expect acceptance and understanding from people to whom we are close emotionally. Isn't it natural? When THEY do not accept us, when they do not understand us, when they do not even want to see who we really are - we feel deeply dissappointed and even upset. Our "foundation" for "feeling good" is absent. It is very easy to lose control and leave the annoying company. I used to do it all the time.
Now I try to see them as babies. Can you blame a baby that it hasn't yet learned to walk? All we can do is to SHOW babies how we walk ourselves and offer our assistance when and if they CHOOSE to learn to walk. Of course, it IS still dissappointing if a baby CHOOSES not to try...
The only solution I see at the moment is to keep walking... [Tom]
If you do what you've always done, you'll get what you always got.
Infatuation arises from things you can see, hear, smell, taste, or touch. But with real love you can see far more about the person than first meets the eye.
With infatuation, the things that attract you are relatively few, but seem very enticing. However, with love, many or most of the person's qualities attract you.
Infatuation tends to rise up quickly. But love develops more slowly.
During dating and courtship, smooth and consistent interest in each other can tell much about a couple's romance. In an infatuation, interest comes and goes. Mature love is evenly balanced and temperate. Whereas romantic love (infatuation) is hot, mature love is warm. Mature love is not an extreme, but a way of life.
Your mind will naturally seek the easiest person to be with, one with whom there is no struggle, no rough edges to work out, one with whom it is easy and comfortable.
But your heart, your true inner self, will seek the person who can best help you in your search for truth.
The mind seeks an easy relationship. The heart more wisely seeks a spiritual partner
Infatuation is marked by a feeling of insecurity. You are excited by it. You are excited and eager, but not genuinely happy. There are nagging doubts, unanswered questions, little bits and pieces about your beloved that you would as soon not examine too closely. It might spoil the dream.
Love is quiet understanding and the mature acceptance of imperfection. It is real. It gives you strength. You are warmed by his presence, even when he is away. Miles do not separate you. You may want him nearer. But near or far, you know he is yours and you can wait.
Infatuation says, "We must get married right away. I can't risk losing him." Love says, "Be patient. Don't panic. Plan your future with confidence."
Infatuation might lead you to do things you'll regret later, but love never does.
Love is an upper. It makes you look up. It makes you think up. It makes you a better person than you were before.
It is romantic infatuation, not real love, which has a disorganizing and destructive effect on your personality. Infatuation makes you less effective, less efficient, less your real self.
Real love will have an organizing and a constructive effect on your personality. It brings out the best in you. There is an intense and satisfying feeling of greater self-realization and expression, as well as a feeling of having one's own personality reinforced, strengthened, and enriched. Love gives you new energy and ambition, and more interest in life. It is creative and brings an eagerness to grow, to improve, to work for worthy purposes and ideals. Love is associated with feelings of self-confidence, trust and security. The person who loves makes an effort to be more deserving of the beloved.
