Negative Emotions + Anxiety + Suppression of Emotions

[Zark]

This thread started from another thread here.

I'm not sure I believe in the 'supressed emotions' concept. You are responsible for your feelings, and all that matters is what you feel right now. It took me many readings to finally understand the depth of 'The Ego' chapter of TFOC, which I recommend you re-read.

You choose your own feelings. If in the past you chose not to express rage and violence, it doesn't mean that it is still there 'waiting to get out'. However, like the chapter states, in your mind you'll find everything, including rage and violence. The important thing is that you can choose not to feel them and avoid feelings that you find unpleasant.

Well, I think the term is badly misused. So I suppose I can agree that the current use of this concept is a badly mangled and distorted. What people describe as 'suppressed emotions' from years back.. in my mind these are just bitter memories that we haven't managed to let go of.

If there was an emotion that I habitually try to suppress, that one would be anxiety. I simply do not know how to dea with it. In fact I agree that there may be a biochemical problem at the root of anxiety.. after all the anxiety completely evaporated whilst fasting.

peace
z

[Vesko]

If there was an emotion that I habitually try to suppress, that one would be anxiety. I simply do not know how to dea with it. In fact I agree that there may be a biochemical problem at the root of anxiety.. after all the anxiety completely evaporated whilst fasting.

In my experience, I have found that the best key to fight anxiety. It's to make the best use of my time and try to use my mind's capacity to the the fullest, even if I fail. When I fail, I learn and try again. This effectively shuts down all anxiety and starts the healing process in my the body.

I have found that meditation can help against anxiety, but when I feel that my life is going in the wrong direction, no amount of meditation can help me to stay calm all day, although it can help immensely while thinking of a solution. I simply ought to fix the problem by doing something, not just sitting meditating!

I have had a lot of problems with anxiety during the past 7 years, I think far more than the average person. I have greatly reduced anxiety as of today. There were many moments when I was far from living a normal life, I was too agitated but coped what I could. In every case it was because I wanted to do something else which I saw as a very right thing to do, rather than what I was ordered to or was supposed to at the time.

I wonder, while fasting what else did you change in your life that could possibly have completely removed anxiety? If you did not change anything else, then I congratulate you, you are a very happy man that simply needs to care more for his body.

[bomohwkl]

You choose your own feelings. If in the past you chose not to express rage and violence,

Personally, I dont think that your feeling is the result of my own choosing. Thus kind of bad feeling is usually the result of certain perception, beliefs and principles of events we have adpoted because at that time we think that such perceptions, beliefs and principles would serve us well. Look within yourself and you will know.
However, if we can narrrow down the cause that upset us, we should take action to change the perceptions, beliefs and principles.
When similar situation occur, you are more prepared to face it and you will not get upset if the change of perceptions, beliefs and principles work.
It is just a process of refinement of perceptions, beliefs and principles.

The important thing is that you can choose not to feel them and avoid feelings that you find unpleasant.

If you choose not to feel them, this is called the suppressed emotion. You can alleviate it by concentrating works that demand left brain thinking. But the problem is still there as long as the inccorect perceptions, beliefs and principles have not changed.

If there was an emotion that I habitually try to suppress, that one would be anxiety

The question is WHY do you feel anxious? What trigger such anxiety? What are the perceptions, beliefs and principles of your life that causes it.

[Meedan]

Yes, I think you're right bomo. I was confusing the two concepts: feelings and actions that cause feelings. Thanks for clearing that up for me.

Regarding anxiety, I used to - until very recently - have a problem with anxiety. One of the things that helped me to relieve a lot of it was the concept of 'living in the now'. It seems to be almost impossible to worry or have anxiety when your awareness is on the present.

The book that told me the most about this concept is "The Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment" by Eckhart Tolle. However, I'm sure there may be a few other books better than this one as the author seems to put in a lot of beliefs and clouds the meanings of terms. With this book it is a bit of a task to find the gems amongst the pile. Not much of a recommendation is it .

I wonder if this is what Thao meant by it being 'eternally the present' for the Great Intellect.

[Zark]

Regarding anxiety, I used to - until very recently - have a problem with anxiety. One of the things that helped me to relieve a lot of it was the concept of 'living in the now'. It seems to be almost impossible to worry or have anxiety when your awareness is on the present.

wonderful advice Meedan !

[bomohwkl]

Source: Way of NLP

A strategy for feeling anxious is to create a series of big bright, close pictures of all the possible things that could go wrong.Looking at these pictures will make you feel bad. When you are anxious about someone who has stayed out late, for example, you may experience a lot of bad feelings while vividly imagining everything that might have happened to them. Then you get angry with them, holding them responsible for the feelings. They may not be very considerate, but you have created the pictures and the feelings, not them. Remember, we have wonderful creative mental powers and we can choose the feelings we create in outselves.

It is quite true the way to provoke anxiety. Although, I personally, dont think that your feeling is the result of my own choosing. It is a result of perceptions, beliefs and principles. It is norm for us to ensure that the bright picture is not upsetted by possible things that will go wrong. The question is if you are too anxious to prevent the possible things that will go wrong, your anxiety itself will upset your bright picture. There is a balance we need to achieve. For me, I write down steps and strategies in a piece of paper when suddenly things go wrong in my bright picture. And I also write down how I can act in such a way to have a balance. So that I have a peace of mind. At the end, if something happens, you have done your best.

I highly recommended the book: Way of NLP by Jpseph O'Connor & Ian McDermott for not only understanding yourself better by for accelerated self-development.

[Vesko]

Last year I was searching for information on how to cure my hay fever. I came across a site which told true stories about people who managed to cure their hay fever through NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) techniques. An analogous technique about overcoming fear of the dentist was published there. It was basically this: you need to train before going to the dentist. You start imagining yourself in the worst situation that you naturally imagine while at the dentist's, e.g. (my example) the dentist holding a HILTI to drill your teeth. Once you imagine it, you train to change more and more parts of this terrifying picture into a positive experience, and hold this positive version in your mind, discarding the previous one, until you start seeing the dentist smiling and the entire atmosphere very relaxing and pleasant, thus overcoming any irrational fear.

[Leventis]

I have read Transformation & Healing: The Sutra on the Four Establishments of Mindfulness by Thich Nhat Hanh http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/de ... 7?v=glance
It talks a lot about meditation and things like that, but there are also some exercieses. Some of them explain about emotions and I think two of them about anger. What he sais in his book is that we are our feelings. We are anger we are hatred we are also love and every other feeling. We are the ones that should control the feeling and not the feeling overwhelming our reason. Just imagine when you are angry that you can do many irational things. This means that we are completely out of control. He says that we should breath deeply and try to understand the root of the problem. Why do we get angry? In your cases anxious? About anger he states that most of the times it is because of misunderstanding. It is very true, when I read this book everytime I would get mad I would try to understand the reason. This happens more easily when I meditate. I am also able to notice anger on other people and where its bases are. Pretty interesting book
Meedan gave a very nice explanation about the two different things.

[survivor]

I find this fascinating, that many members of this forum have had some form of mental/physical and or substance abuse affect/hinder their life, in one way or another. Coincidence? Who know's, but I shall join the queue.

[Aisin]

Survivor, that's an interesting thought, where did you get the idea from?

On a more serious note, I don't think that's true. There is no coincidence. Because it's just how we view it, when we have health problem or emotional problem, is that a trauma? Yes only if you want it to be a trauma.

On the other hand, I think most people in the world face those same physical & psychological 'hindrance'. The only common thing I can say about people in this forum, is that we at least have the little bit of awareness & consciousness of the problems we face, and we actively search to improve them. There're many others in the world who don't even realize they have a problem.

So, I wouldn't say we're the 'chosen' ones in anyway (I'm not implying u meant that), that we are the only ones having endured sufferings.

BTW, has anyone read Dave Pelzer's books? It was an amazing account of forgiveness and courage, I'm intrigued by how he's able to let go and continue to love. I shan't elaborate more, else I'll be sensationalizing his experience.

[survivor]

Survivor, that's an interesting thought, where did you get the idea from?

I was just trolling through the Topics and threads.

On a more serious note, I don't think that's true. There is no coincidence.

Yes, I agree, I merely used the word "coincidence" as a tool.

So, I wouldn't say we're the 'chosen' ones in anyway (I'm not implying u meant that), that we are the only ones having endured sufferings.

DOH!

[Yothu]

I'm just watching a set of DVD's with Richard Bandler on stage in Ireland. DVD set's called "A Guide to Being Happy". Sounds religious to me, but appears to be just a manual to how to use your own mind.

30 Years of NLP - How to live a Happy life

This 4 DVD set was recorded in Dublin to celebrate 30 years of NLP. It is a brilliant video for those starting to learn the techniques and methodologies of Dr Richard Bandler and for those with more experience.



For anybody that's interested, here's what it says on the inlay of the cover:

Special 30th Year Anniversary of Neuro Linguistic Programming

In the land known best for it's poetic and cultural charm and a huge emphasis on language, in the very heart of one of the most beautiful cities in the world, in a place full of magic, intrigue, fascination and fun... comes one of the most insipiring seminars ever to land on the shores of Ireland.

In 1973, Dr Richard Bandler set out on a journey to explore what was possible in helping people become happier and more effective. He co-founded the field of Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP). Now, 30 years on, Dr Bandler celebrates the anniversary of NLP, with a special 2-day seminar in Dublin, Ireland.

Due to popular demand, Richard returns to Dublin for one of the most significant workshops of the last decade. Hilarious, thought provoking and most certainly a genius, Dr Bandler has dedicated his life to teaching people how to become happy and more effective. Now, in his latest workshop, Richard supported by two of his top trainers, presents "A Guide to Being Happy".

[bomohwkl]

Happy being OBESE!!!!??!!!!
He must have eating disorder. Or use food for getting happiness.

[Yothu]

Yeah, the "master" got old...
wait... I should rather say: the "master's body got old..."

From "An Evening with Richard Bandler" (some twenty years before):

[Lena]

Regarding anxiety, I used to - until very recently - have a problem with anxiety. One of the things that helped me to relieve a lot of it was the concept of 'living in the now'. It seems to be almost impossible to worry or have anxiety when your awareness is on the present.

The book that told me the most about this concept is "The Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment" by Eckhart Tolle. However, I'm sure there may be a few other books better than this one as the author seems to put in a lot of beliefs and clouds the meanings of terms. With this book it is a bit of a task to find the gems amongst the pile. Not much of a recommendation is it .

I wonder if this is what Thao meant by it being 'eternally the present' for the Great Intellect.

"Living in the now" is how I deal with stress. It's not the best strategy from my experience because if I was faced with responsibilities that were too stressfull I'd push it out of my mind to the point that I'd completely forget about it... which makes me content in the moment, but of course leads to consequences later on

Happy being OBESE!!!!??!!!!

there are people who are missing limbs, have aids, cancer, etc... who don't let their health sitations make them depressed in life. why should an obese man be any different? health and happiness don't always have to go hand in hand.

I find this fascinating, that many members of this forum have had some form of mental/physical and or substance abuse affect/hinder their life, in one way or another. Coincidence? Who know's, but I shall join the queue.

I was watching a buddhist woman speaking on TV (sorry I forget her name) and she said that most people have spiritual revolutions after severe trauma in life. (this is the case with me, and I'm sure other members too). this woman, for example, sought out spiritual guidance after her divorce because she needed to learn how to let go of the anger and pain, and now she is better off than she was before the divorce!

maybe people won't look/ask for help/change until they desperately need it