Expectation and Suffering
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Expectation and Suffering
It seems that one of our major suffering is cultivating expectation from others. Do you find it difficult not to cultivate expectation from others? Don't the G.I expect us to love it back? Then how do we cultivate expectation without experience suffering? Or all unfullied expectation leads to suffering?
Re: Expectation and suffering
Absolutely!!bomohwkl wrote:It seems that one of our major suffering is cultivating expectation from others.
No.Do you find it difficult not to cultivate expectation from others?
He does, but he is also probably very just in his expectations because of his intelligence and knowledge of his creations. The same cannot be said of us on Earth, as we "know nothing of nature" [Michel's book].Don't the G.I expect us to love it back?
We need to learn to expect from others in a just, unselfish way, based on the perfect knowledge of our own actions in relation to them, and the knowledge of what is best for others in our mutual interaction. Knowing all that, we would not have false expectation and we would not have to erroneously demand from or force anyone in the wrong situation.Then how do we cultivate expectation without experience suffering?
This statement is false, since a single counterexample proves it wrong:Or all unfullied expectation leads to suffering?
Let's suppose a young child expects his parents to do anything for him. Wise parents won't do everything demanded or they'll spoil the child. Will that lead to suffering for the child? While the child may suffer because his pleas to his parents are unanswered, e.g. cry, this suffering would be insignificant in comparison with the one that would ensue if all such demands were met.
I have personally learned a good lesson recently, that when people have interaction with other people, it is of utmost significance in order to avoid suffering to get all the terms and conditions clear well in advance of the interaction. If parties don't/can't get the terms and conditions straight, expectations of some or all will go through the roof, and suffering is guaranteed.
Do you REALLY practice meditation? If your REALLY do, do you practice a GOOD method? Are you sure this is REALLY so?
All unfullied expectation leads to suffering at least in short term.
Is it a universal truth?
Thiaooubians expect people themsleves to behave according to universal laws. In an extreme exmple, they don't expect their own kind to assassinate their people on Thiaoouba. It is because, they know that the other of their own kinds are WISE enough to behave in a certain way by their own free-will.
On earth, when expectation is unfulfilled in particular to those who we are emotionally close, it is because we believe that he/she will behave in such a way due to some reasons.
Given the child-mother example,
the child thinks that since mother loves the child so much, the child would expect the mother to pamper the child by giving whatever the child one. But a wise mother, as we know will not do that.
It is because, the child hasn't yet come to understand the concept of mother-love and hence cultivating expectation that is not to his own good in future. Hence, in such situation, a child will figure out why his/her mother behaved like that. Always, the child will make some sort of conclusion that his/her mother doesn't love him/her enough. We all know that it is not true. This is something we have always to look against from reaching a wrong conclusion by ourselves.
Hence, I think cultivating expectation doesn't necessary led to suffering. We just need to cultivate expectation in a right way. As example shown above, unfufilled expectation exposed our weakeness. Probably, we believe that we have understood the persons in enough to expect him/her to behave in such a way. It led us to re-examine our ways of thinking and our own understanding of us and people around us. Only achieve sufficient understanding of people, we will be able to cultivate healthy expectation.
From my private study, I find out that higher-self will arrange to test us when we think that we would be able to face a situation. For example, if you think that it is easy not to cultivate expectation on other people, the higher-self will arrange something that blow you off, just to see whether you really what you think you are exposing weakness that need to address.
Conclusion:
Hence, I think cultivating expectation doesn't necessary led to suffering. We just need to cultivate expectation in a right way given we have understood sufficiently.
Is it a universal truth?
G.I is also probably very just in his expectations because of his intelligence and knowledge of his creations.
In think the word just is a bit vague.we would not have false expectation and we would not have to erroneously demand from or force anyone in the wrong situation
Thiaooubians expect people themsleves to behave according to universal laws. In an extreme exmple, they don't expect their own kind to assassinate their people on Thiaoouba. It is because, they know that the other of their own kinds are WISE enough to behave in a certain way by their own free-will.
On earth, when expectation is unfulfilled in particular to those who we are emotionally close, it is because we believe that he/she will behave in such a way due to some reasons.
Given the child-mother example,
the child thinks that since mother loves the child so much, the child would expect the mother to pamper the child by giving whatever the child one. But a wise mother, as we know will not do that.
It is because, the child hasn't yet come to understand the concept of mother-love and hence cultivating expectation that is not to his own good in future. Hence, in such situation, a child will figure out why his/her mother behaved like that. Always, the child will make some sort of conclusion that his/her mother doesn't love him/her enough. We all know that it is not true. This is something we have always to look against from reaching a wrong conclusion by ourselves.
Hence, I think cultivating expectation doesn't necessary led to suffering. We just need to cultivate expectation in a right way. As example shown above, unfufilled expectation exposed our weakeness. Probably, we believe that we have understood the persons in enough to expect him/her to behave in such a way. It led us to re-examine our ways of thinking and our own understanding of us and people around us. Only achieve sufficient understanding of people, we will be able to cultivate healthy expectation.
From my private study, I find out that higher-self will arrange to test us when we think that we would be able to face a situation. For example, if you think that it is easy not to cultivate expectation on other people, the higher-self will arrange something that blow you off, just to see whether you really what you think you are exposing weakness that need to address.
Conclusion:
Hence, I think cultivating expectation doesn't necessary led to suffering. We just need to cultivate expectation in a right way given we have understood sufficiently.